1. Assigning a religious significance to a day not specified in the Scriptures or becoming upset because others give gifts or enjoy the season to be with friends and family.
There is of course no Biblical basis for observing Christmas as a day or season. Although the Bible has told us how Christ was born, it never tells us exactly what day. Nor would it be correct for the Church to observe it as part of worship, because there is not that command or example, and the Church should be governed by the word of God and not religious tradition.
But, on the other hand, as long as one is not assigning a spiritual significance, we should not be critical of those who use this time to give gifts to others, enjoy good food, or spend time with family and friends. But, remember that this season of the year does have its dangers. The matter is really more serious than we sometimes think, and there are real points of danger in these days, and we should be ready to recognize them.
Let us look for a few moments at what those might be, and out of a motive of love for others, we will suggest some ways to avoid the pitfalls of these days that we pass through each year.
2. Spending too much
With our emotions high and our concerns that our gift be treasured and appreciated, some spend more than is rational, justifying the expense by saying that the person is worth it or that the season just comes once a year. However, bills can pile up to a point that they are felt well beyond this season of the year. Such bills become a burden that can distract us from our service to God, causing some to work long hours to pay debts and causing some to fail in giving to the Lord’s work as they should.
Often there can be problems in marriages. There can be anger, heated discussions and unnecessary strains on the marriage relationship, sometimes even violence! There are always more people that we know and love than we could ever buy gifts for. In addition, is it rational to think that people value us according to what we give them as gifts at this time of the year?
Perhaps if the person has that way of thinking, we should consider giving nothing to them at all so that he or she might learn another way of valuing his friends or loved ones. Do we not rather show our love through what we do each day of the year?
Suggestions:
Perhaps we could give less expensive gifts that are things that we ourselves have made or give thoughtful little things that we, because of our personal knowledge and concern for the person, can give that no one else would think to give. It is the quality of thoughtfulness, not the monetary value that will make the impression. Anyone with a credit card can spend money! Only a thoughtful, loving person can see a person’s real needs.
a. Remember, you are a steward of what God gives you. Use it wisely, remembering spiritual priorities!!!
b. If you are married, consider planning your buying together and setting amounts that will not be exceeded in order to avoid problems later.
c. Make it clear to your family members (and be honest) that you do not require expensive gifts of your loved ones and do not think that they should put themselves in financial difficulty to please you.
d. Make a conscious decision not to generate serious personal and marital problems, because of over- spending!!
3. Planning for everything to be perfect
As one approaches any event he considers important or enjoyable, it is common to form expectations about just how one wants everything to be. However, it is also common to form expectations that are so high that the expectations, themselves, become a problem.
Have you ever started into something and wanted it to be just right. You work, prepare, and provide everything so that everything will be just perfect; your best effort. But, very soon, you discover a problem–others are not working at it as hard as you and don’t take it as seriously as you do. That’s where the hard feelings start. “I’ve worked so hard and no one else cooperates. They don’t help me! They just don’t care.” Naturally, the next step is to think, “Well, if they don’t care about all that I have done, and they don’t pay attention to all the work I’ve done, they don’t care about me or love me either.” And so, on it goes and as we become miserable, we pass that feeling on to others as we express our hard feelings. If someone tries to cheer us up, we resist their efforts, making them feel frustrated as well.
We have to stop and think, is this what God wants us to do? We turn a family time into a family misery time, all because we wanted it to be perfect.
Isn’t it odd? We accomplish the opposite of what we wanted. We tell ourselves that we are doing it for others, but is it possible that there is a bit of selfishness in how we are going about the matter? You can see that in the end, we don’t really serve anyone’s well-being, going about it in this way, not even our own. And we are certainly not doing God’s will if we are speaking badly of others and making their lives miserable and ours, as well.
Remember:
1 Corinthians 16:14 Let all your things be done with charity (love).
Things don’t have to come out just as we planned them to be good and enjoyable.
4. Trying to please everyone.
Life is not that way! We can never please everyone, but we can and must please God.
5. Focusing on what we don’t have and placing our emphasis on things
Many will be without what they need during this season. For them, these days may be especially hard. Also, many will find it easy to put too much emphasis on material things.
Luke 12:15 And He said to them, “Take heed and beware of covetousness, for one’s life does not consist in the abundance of the things he possesses.”
1 John 2:1: Do not love the world or the things in the world. If anyone loves the world, the love of the Father is not in him. 16 For all that is in the world—the lust of the flesh, the lust of the eyes, and the pride of life—is not of the Father but is of the world. 17 And the world is passing away, and the lust of it; but he who does the will of God abides forever.
6. Thinking about those who are no longer with us and times that are past.
At this time of the year, we think of the ones we have lost or those that live far away; those who have been so significant to us, but are no longer with us. In the past, they made the season what it was, now we are faced with the reality of living through this season without them. The older one is, the more he/she feels this. As children, we hardly felt this at all. These feelings are natural. But often while feeling such things, do we fail to enjoy those we have around us because of our sadness about those who we cannot have near? Will we forget the ones who live around us, who would like to enjoy our company? Should we make others suffer. Is that what Christ would have us do?
Luke 6:31 And as ye would that men should do to you, do ye also to them likewise.
Selfishly burying ourselves in our grief over past losses will not help those are with us now who love us or who might need our comfort. We must exert certain self-control on our minds and thoughts.
2 Peter 1:6 And to knowledge temperance; and to temperance (Greek: self-control) patience; and to patience godliness;
Suggestion:
Try to find those who have similar losses and sadness, and do what you can to help them. You may find that cheering others will be a way that you can find enjoyment for yourself.
7. Conflicts with others
During this season we are often in contact with people that we don’t see during much of the year. Old conflicts and personality differences can provide the opportunity for arguments, especially if there is considerable drinking. We would do well to be aware of this pitfall and avoid it. If we have wronged someone, the season may give us an opportunity to ask forgiveness and leave those problems in the past.
8. Getting overly tired and expecting everyone else to put the same emphasis on the preparations.
In these days, we find so much to do. It is easy to become over-stretched, over commit, and try to do to much, even if we have good health. This can result in becoming more irritable and emotional or possibly even falling ill. God does not want us to do damage to our health or become irritable and say and do things we should not.
Also, not everyone will put the same importance on the preparations that you do. Not understanding that from the beginning may cause us to become disappointed and and angry with others for not helping accomplish our goals. Do what you can and want to do. If others will not help, you will have to limit your efforts to what you can accomplish. If your husband or wife needs your help, try to be understanding, and help out with their plans if you can.
9. Exposing oneself to temptation
There is a danger that exists for Christians at this time of year in respect to social events. Accepting certain invitations can lead us into situations where we know the temptation to abuse alcohol or participate in entertainment that is not suitable for a Christian is entirely too strong. We must keep our example strong. As Christians, we often find it necessary to refuse such invitations, no matter how important they may seem to be socially or professionally. Watch your example and influence. Make sure they shine!!
Matthew 5:14 Ye are the light of the world. A city that is set on an hill cannot be hid.
10. Failing to keep in mind what is really important
The importance that some put on these days can cause some to loose their sense of perspective. It is easy to be caught up in it all and forget what is really important. Common sense is often lost, and we think and act in ways that are not wise.
Remember:
The spiritual values and endeavors are always the most important and must be put first even at this time of the year. We will have to live with what we say and do in this part of the year even into next year, and maybe for the rest of our life.
Matthew 6:33 But seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things shall be added to you.